From: Jach Pursel
Date: Wednesday, May 09, 2001 12:32 PM
Subject: With Great Sorrow...

Dear Everyone,

Peny North died in her sleep in the early morning hours Wednesday, May 09, 2001. She had a quiet and peaceful passing.

Free of the physical plane, she is with Lazaris now; she is with him "forever and a day." Most likely they are sitting under that tree overlooking the sea of possibility of which he so often speaks. Surely they are talking and laughing together as they always did while Peny was with us.

Her work on Earth is complete. Her work - a Great Work -- continues.

We will all miss her dearly. None will miss her more than Michaell, her husband of 24 years -- her friend and companion for eternity -- and me.

Much love,

Jach

P.S. Please do not send flowers. If you want to make a contribution in honor of Peny, please make it to your favorite charity. There will be no services. We have cancelled the May workshop and the two June workshops. If you were registered for any of these, call the office the week of May 14th for details.

Thank you,

Jach

You already know of Peny's death Wednesday, May 9,
2001. I write to let you know
that Michaell joined Peny with his death during the
afternoon hours of the same
day.

Peny and Michaell, in the richness and depth of their
love and intimacy, had
an agreement that if one of them died, the other would
follow as soon as possible.

Michaell said his final physical goodbyes to Peny in
the early morning hours
of that day. During the afternoon hours, sitting out
by the pool where he and
Peny often sat together, Michaell ended his life. He
died quickly and without
any physical pain. His passing was also peaceful.
Sacred covenant fulfilled,
they are together now.

Society calls suicide a crime. Within the broad range
of spirituality and within
that which is called the new age, many judge suicide
as weakness in the face
of crisis or at least are suspect of the motives.
Perhaps in many cases such
judgments or suspicions are valid. In this case, they
are not.

I do not send this message to everyone on the Concept:
Synergy mailing list.
I send it to those such as you who have an open heart,
who have an open mind,
and who can understand that Michaell was not weak and
his motives were not suspect.

Michaell had a rare courage to make and honor his word
and to live, and now to
die, in a way that expressed his strength, his power,
his love, and his precious
and unending love for Peny. He had a phenomenal
courage to live and die reflecting
more of his real self.

Michaell's suicide was an act of incredible courage
and strength. His motivation?
His love for the most wonderful woman in the world:
His love for Peny.

I say it again: Sacred covenant fulfilled, they are
together now and forever.

Thank you for understanding.

Of all the irresponsible, outrageous acts that Jach has performed in this life, this one is probably the worst. It's a stone, cold, manipulative lie that Jach believes that Michaell's actions were noble or that Peny is doing fine.

Even those of us on this site who despise her did her the honor of expressing our feelings honestly. There is nothing sacred about a "covenance" of denial, cowardice and deception.

How does any of this fit with the teachings of Lazaris? It doesn't. If there is a Lazaris, they would not wish to see people respond to this situation as Michaell has.

Jach, it's over. For once in your life, take proper responsibility and don't thrust it onto the sincere people who have put their trust in you and your alleged entity.

Peny and Michaell are not representative of people who have taken responsibility for their lives. Their destructive behavior and the subsequent consequences do not negate the power of meta-physics or the power of Love.

For these who are feeling disempowered because even the people closest to Lazaris have not manifested their desire, consider that many people who have never heard of Lazaris have lived long, rich and productive lives.

Jach wrote in his email that he hoped that people do not question Michaell's motives in taking his life.

I am wondering why Jach sent out an email announcing that he is mourning Peny's death along with Michaell and then today reveal that Michaell took his life shortly after.

I sincerely hope that anyone who is in pain or confusion over Peny and now Michaell's death and the sparse details around the circumstances of their deaths find a way to reach out and connect with others.

Everyone is an adult and is capable of making their own decisions.

I do feel there are circumstances in which despair and lack of answers can cloud the judgement of even the most sincere and enlightened people.

I think there is a potential loss of meaning for many people who were involved in the Lazaris material now that Peny and Michaell are gone.

When a sense of meaning is lost, it can be a painful and dangerous time.

Peny and Michaell's deaths have tremendous impact on so many people. Michaell made a choice for whatever reason to end his life shortly after Peny. His choice, his reasons. so be it.

I do not sit in judgement of that decision but I do not nobilize or elevate it either as I feel Jach's email attempts to do.

For me it doesn't work to say that a love is so great that if the object of my love is gone there is no reason for living.

It is a choice one is free to make but in my opinion it is not a growth choice but one made out of fear that life without a certain person lacks meaning.

That places an enormous burden on the psyche of another.

For a person to decide that life is not worth living because another specific person is no longer on the planet is a tremendously painful and constricting pyschic contract in my opinion.

This is not consistent with any model of pyschological or spiritual health that I am familiar with.

I love the expression "God is in the details" for me that sums up as best as can be articulated the search for the meaning of life.

This is a universe of unending detail and thus unending opportunities for meaning, in other words..God is everyhere and never in only one place, certainly not in one specific mortal person.

The point that I am ever so slowly getting to here is that the inevitable consequence of placing all the meaning of life on one other mortal persons shoulders is that you loose a lot more than physical life.

In essence you are saying "God is here and nowhere else".

All this is to say I hope that everyone in pain over these difficult events finds some solace in reaching out and connecting with others.

Cheers,

Jeremiah

In his email Jach explains Michaell's suicide with the following:

quote:

---

Peny and Michaell, in the richness and depth of their
> love and intimacy, had
> an agreement that if one of them died, the other would
> follow as soon as possible.

---

Peny, Michaell and Jach organize their lives around communication with a non physical entity.

And yet at the crux of this suicide pact seems to lie the belief that intimacy and love is less profound between the spiritual and physical worlds.

The belief seems to be that in order to love a person fully and experience that intimacy fully both parties must be alive together or dead together.

Thats fine, many people in the "consensus" believe just that.

However,

Peny talked about the depth of love and intimacy between herself and Lazaris and yet Lazaris was non physical during that period she was physical..certainly.

CS is heavy handed about marketing Lazaris love and caring. "Forever and a day...etc"

The whole nexus of their marketing plan is that love and intimacy with the unseen is not only possible but already established and readily available in the form of Lazaris.

Yet Jach Peny and Michaell seemed to believe that the membrane between physical and non physical existence is a barrier to love and intimacy?

There is also the issue of what Lazaris [although not just Lazaris but what even consensus science teaches] that time and space are illusions of this 3 maybe 4 dimensional universe.

Lazaris teaches, intelligently and coherently [imo] that we are multidimensional beings.

As multidimensional beings, death is an expansion beyond the physical where the restrictions of time and space do not apply.

We are spiritual beings having a human experience.

With death, that experience expands beyond the physical but does not preclude the experience of the physical.

In other words we don't "loose" anything. We gain perspectives beyond the physical without loosing the option of a physical perspective.

A less dense perspective perhaps, but from all reports that is a delightful way to experience the physical world.

Consciousness is multidimensional.

Lazaris talks about how when your die friends and relatives who are still "alive" greet you because you have expanded your awareness of your own multidimensional nature.

It seems that with physical death, according to Lazaris, the distinctions become much less rigid between "life" and "death".

Yet in light of all of this profound [again imo] teaching about the multidimensional nature of us spiritual beings having a human experience, Jach, Michaell and Peny make a suicide pact?

here is another strange thing:

Time and space are illusions. Thus any experience of seperation is an illusion.

It doesn't make ANY spiritual or metaphysical sense to slay yourself in order to continue to experience a relationship with a loved one you experienced while physical.

Further.

Since time and space are illusions, it makes no sense to "hurry up" to be with someone who has died.

Michaell North could have lived to be 170 and at the "moment" of his death chosen to make it "the moment" that Peny died physically and the two of them could have experienced their "covenant" without any loss of physical life.

Lazaris lucidly taught that time is an illusion. Lazaris pointed out that one way to conceptualize time outside of a linear framework is to think of time as a series of points of consciousness.

Not only that but as I understand what Lazaris teaches, you don't have to die to change your experience of linear time to something more exponential and multidimensional.

Peny wrote about communicating clearly with the dead in the forwards to some of those books.

Some might argue that "yeah, all that is true but they must have been going for some esoteric intensity that they had a secret handle on."

Maybe, but doubtful.

It is disturbing to think that all those people in the forum having the same thoughts and questions I just expressed are most likely being manipulated into silence by the gang.

We must allow for the possiblity that there wasn't really a covenant after all. That is less showy and dramatic but certainly a possibility.

Another possible version of events has to do with Peny being unable or unwilling to grok and apply metaphysics to her own at one time promising life, driven by delusion and paranoia, simply died.

Maybe Jach and CS never took to heart what Lazaris said about death not being a failure and that death is not a shameful act. Not knowing how to handle the questions and expectations decided to hide.

Maybe Michaell overwhelmed with grief and in a confused state simply killed himself.

Maybe we will never know.

At this point I have a hard time buying this Adonis and Venus story they are putting out now.

The thing that really disturbs me if this suicide pact did in fact exist is how the pressure to fulfill the "covenant" affected Michaell in the moments after Peny's death.

Did he really want to end his life or was he afraid to go on with his life without honoring his "commitment"?

I sincerely hope that he wanted to die with an open and complete awareness and that there wasn't a circuit of psychological pressure to end his life because he promised he would.

Jeremiah

I'm still digesting this, so no comment yet,but here is the mail Jach sent out for those of imperfect heart who do not qualify to have received it.

quote:

---

From: Jach Pursel
>Reply-To: conceptsynergy@att.net
>Subject: Clarification & Positive News
>Date: Wed, 23 May 2001 11:55:34 -0400
>
>Dear Everyone,
>
>I write to you with a clarification and with positive news. My last email
>to
>you was written while I was in unimaginable depths of shock, pain, and
>grief.
>In the midst of my tragic chaos, I wrote because I wanted you to know what
>happened
>and I wanted you to hear it from me. Two weeks have passed. Now I write in
>a
>clearer and stronger place.
>
>In my previous email I wrote to tell you of Michaell's suicide and to
>explain
>his personal reasons for doing that. I attempted to write without any
>judgment
>either way. Perhaps I fell short of my goal.
>
>CLARIFICATION: Neither Concept: Synergy, Lazaris, nor I condone, support,
>or
>encourage suicide. Michaell's choice was his personal one only. It was not
>the
>choice I would have made. Obviously, I am here. It is not a choice that any
>us
>who were/are so close to Peny and Michaell would have made. I also know
>that
>Michaell never would have even suggested that others do what he did.
>
>POSITIVE NEWS: I am doing fine. Under the circumstances, I am doing
>remarkably
>well. I am not saying my grief is done. Stages and phases of grief will
>continue
>for some time yet. I am past the initial and the hardest time. I am doing
>fine.
>
>Out of all this, my resolve to live life fully and powerfully has grown
>stronger.
>My determination to express and reflect the joy of living life has lifted
>to
>new levels.
>
>I am starting to write the fliers for upcoming workshops and to return to
>my
>daily routine. All of us here are moving forward with a vivid commitment to
>craft
>a different and new future. We are committed to living life with
>celebration
>and triumph.
>
>Much love,
>
>Jach

---

The last thread is getting too long, and way off topic, so I'm going to try to start new threads which will separate both pertinent discussions.

On the original thread there is discussion in response to Jeremiah's original post but since it is so on topic and raises so many important questions, I'm re-posting it here, hopefully as a springboard for continued discussion on this significant and pertinent topic.

Originally posted by Jeremiah:

quote:

---

Dear All,
In his email Jach explains Michaell's suicide with the following:

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Peny and Michaell, in the richness and depth of their
> love and intimacy, had
> an agreement that if one of them died, the other would
> follow as soon as possible.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Peny, Michaell and Jach organize their lives around communication with a non physical entity.

And yet at the crux of this suicide pact seems to lie the belief that intimacy and love is less profound between the spiritual and physical worlds.

The belief seems to be that in order to love a person fully and experience that intimacy fully both parties must be alive together or dead together.

Thats fine, many people in the "consensus" believe just that.

However,

Peny talked about the depth of love and intimacy between herself and Lazaris and yet Lazaris was non physical during that period she was physical..certainly.

CS is heavy handed about marketing Lazaris love and caring. "Forever and a day...etc"

The whole nexus of their marketing plan is that love and intimacy with the unseen is not only possible but already established and readily available in the form of Lazaris.

Yet Jach Peny and Michaell seemed to believe that the membrane between physical and non physical existence is a barrier to love and intimacy?

There is also the issue of what Lazaris [although not just Lazaris but what even consensus science teaches] that time and space are illusions of this 3 maybe 4 dimensional universe.

Lazaris teaches, intelligently and coherently [imo] that we are multidimensional beings.

As multidimensional beings, death is an expansion beyond the physical where the restrictions of time and space do not apply.

We are spiritual beings having a human experience.

With death, that experience expands beyond the physical but does not preclude the experience of the physical.

In other words we don't "loose" anything. We gain perspectives beyond the physical without loosing the option of a physical perspective.

A less dense perspective perhaps, but from all reports that is a delightful way to experience the physical world.

Consciousness is multidimensional.

Lazaris talks about how when your die friends and relatives who are still "alive" greet you because you have expanded your awareness of your own multidimensional nature.

It seems that with physical death, according to Lazaris, the distinctions become much less rigid between "life" and "death".

Yet in light of all of this profound [again imo] teaching about the multidimensional nature of us spiritual beings having a human experience, Jach, Michaell and Peny make a suicide pact?

here is another strange thing:

Time and space are illusions. Thus any experience of seperation is an illusion.

It doesn't make ANY spiritual or metaphysical sense to slay yourself in order to continue to experience a relationship with a loved one you experienced while physical.

Further.

Since time and space are illusions, it makes no sense to "hurry up" to be with someone who has died.

Michaell North could have lived to be 170 and at the "moment" of his death chosen to make it "the moment" that Peny died physically and the two of them could have experienced their "covenant" without any loss of physical life.

Lazaris lucidly taught that time is an illusion. Lazaris pointed out that one way to conceptualize time outside of a linear framework is to think of time as a series of points of consciousness.

Not only that but as I understand what Lazaris teaches, you don't have to die to change your experience of linear time to something more exponential and multidimensional.

Peny wrote about communicating clearly with the dead in the forwards to some of those books.

Some might argue that "yeah, all that is true but they must have been going for some esoteric intensity that they had a secret handle on."

Maybe, but doubtful.

It is disturbing to think that all those people in the forum having the same thoughts and questions I just expressed are most likely being manipulated into silence by the gang.

We must allow for the possiblity that there wasn't really a covenant after all. That is less showy and dramatic but certainly a possibility.

Another possible version of events has to do with Peny being unable or unwilling to grok and apply metaphysics to her own at one time promising life, driven by delusion and paranoia, simply died.

Maybe Jach and CS never took to heart what Lazaris said about death not being a failure and that death is not a shameful act. Not knowing how to handle the questions and expectations decided to hide.

Maybe Michaell overwhelmed with grief and in a confused state simply killed himself.

Maybe we will never know.

At this point I have a hard time buying this Adonis and Venus story they are putting out now.

The thing that really disturbs me if this suicide pact did in fact exist is how the pressure to fulfill the "covenant" affected Michaell in the moments after Peny's death.

Did he really want to end his life or was he afraid to go on with his life without honoring his "commitment"?

I sincerely hope that he wanted to die with an open and complete awareness and that there wasn't a circuit of psychological pressure to end his life because he promised he would.

Jeremiah

---

For those not familiar with the Lazaris material on co-dependency, getting only slightly hip to what Lazaris talks about on those tapes will reveal this latest manipulation on the part of Pursel and company as an invitation to a codependent dance of silence, obedience and shame.

A blatantly self-serving, self protective move. Maybe their adrenal glands are overworked. Pumping without mercy at the very real threat of an honest confrontation.

But that’s them, we know them. Enough said perhaps.

But the sycophants defending their object of adoration in the face of such blatant betrayal?

Zealotry is an unforgiving master on the soul and the body.

Yet one still has to wonder how it is lost on the gnashing throng of objector/protectors that Jach Pursel’s latest missive to them is a not so thinly veiled invitation embrace him in a codependency of silence, shame and obedience.

Jach opines:

quote:

---

Many of you received a spam email that was sent anonymously. A
few of you wrote an email to me or to the office expressing
your outrage and disgust as well as your anger that someone
would send such an email"

---

Here he begins by instructing the faithful of the correct response to his duplicity being revealed.

Outrage.

Not at him, of course, at the messenger.

Lazaris points out that one of the defining characteristics of a codependent relationship is the enforcement of oppressive rules regarding what can and cannot be discussed and how.

Lazaris also points out that in a codependent relationship there are many topics that are not allowed to be brought up.

CS must have been caught off guard by the intensity of anger, not to mention the probably unprecedented circumstance of having a significant number of clients mustering the temerity to question the facts surrounding Peny’s sad death, her husband’s subsequent suicide.

In their arrogance and perhaps their grief, they probably convinced themselves that they could handle this hemorrhaging in the manner that they usually employed, silence and selected spin.

Invoking the ever-popular “privacy” clause, they manage to offer those conditioned in fear to stop the natural healthy questioning process by feeding them a smug self righteous response to any raised eyebrow.

They are given the gift of respecting Concept Synergy’s “privacy” at the expense of their own legitimate questions and concerns.

They are also given tacit support to attack those who decide to be loyal to themselves and not a business they have no profit from.

DIVERT the legitimate anger felt for Jach Pursel and Concept Synergy to a target that is disposable.

I will say it again; divert the legitimately felt anger at a disposable target. Ted and Katie were considered disposable targets, many others also disposable targets.
People with friends and families and and feelings as important as any other human beings.

Raged on and disposed of like spent Kleenex.

Can anyone really believe that all of the malice and rage that was directed mercilessly at Ted and Katie in the J&L forum and subsequently heaped on them privately BEFORE they every put up this website had much if anything to do with them??? They were strong enough to bounce back. Can that be said about everyone CS has similarly done?

Can anyone argue that with any genuineness?

I think it is plain the unfelt/unexpressed rage and anger that the core CS gang and organization felt toward Penny and Jack coupled with the oppressive psychic burden of having to daily, twist P&J’s toxic, shaming dance of [ Jach's] passive and [Peny's] aggressive abuse into acts of love and kindness, made them a hornets nest of misplaced rage and aggression.

So they do what others in classic codependent relationships do. They alternately mimic the abuser and search, with laser focus for a target to express the rage and resentment they are not permitted to feel and discuss. All the while decrying how much they hate fighting [as Peny did both privately and a few times in the forum].

They may hate it but the dynamic of the forum demands it for the mythology built around Peny and Jach and Michaell to stay in place and that is more important than any one person, it would seem, to that organization.

The individual is disposable, the truth is irrelevant.

Jach writes:

quote:

---

Those of you who wrote expressed
your love and support and that you were handling your process

and were “letting this go” and were undaunted by it"

---

Support for what?

for the painfully obvious attempt to distort the facts and manufacture a myth that was exposed as a lie by the mystical order of the Orlando police department?

“undaunted”? Undaunted by what? an unsigned email? Or the truth? Which is more problematic for you and your business?

What an interesting word to use “undaunted” sounds so noble, so persevering. But undauntedness in embracing a lie in the face of the truth is far, far from noble.

“Letting this go” : what are they letting go of ? brain? dignity?

Not so nice Jach.

An “undaunted” Jach perisits:

quote:

---

Also, I do not want to discuss that email in the Forum. I do
not want to dignify it with open discussion here. I do not
want to give the anonymous sender audience within this Room. I
ask that you not discuss the content of that email in the Room
either, for the same reasons. Thank you.

---

Because you don’t want to discuss it, it wont be discussed.??

Who are you anyway and on what authority do you speak?.

And by the way, why are you thanking people for something they have no choice in?

Truth is, Jach won’t ALLOW this discussion. Posts attempting to do so were cancelled. So why is he thanking people for following orders?

Jach writes:

quote:

---

To each of you, I apologize for allowing the safety of this
Room to be compromised"

---

The “safety” of Jach’s room is most certainly an issue, not as he defines it but as it functions nobody is safe there.

In order to have personal safety one must be willing and free to think and feel. In that oppressive, toxic, oxegyn deprived purple tent no such "unsafe" activity is allowed.

A final word of caution to those tempted to dip in Jach’s codependent waltz:

Be advised, there will be no reward for your relinquishment of your will, your imagination, your thoughts and feelings at that altar of self interest and commerce known as Concept Synergy.

They do not respect your obedience, they merely demand it.

You will not be thanked and you will not be vindicated.

Question honestly.

Privacy and self-protectiveness are not the same thing, not by a long shot.

Your interests and Concept Synergy's interests are not one in the same.

And if Peny’s death and Michaell’s suicide were completely private affairs then why did Jach and Lazaris address them at all?

The circumstances and truth of these people’s deaths as well as how they lived can be discussed frankly and with respect for everyone involved.

Concept Synergy is a business, don’t forget that.

In closing, I would just like to say that metaphysics is real and and beautiful and enduring.

Metaphysics is certainly not owned and clearly not well understood by Concept Synergy.

One demand, I think, metaphysics makes on those who want the life is that you must be an individual.

In short, I just don’t think you can be a follower and create your own reality.

Think about that one.. and then make your choice.

Thanks,

Jeremiah

It's great to see you back in such great form! This is such an on target post, I almost wish our unseen friend "Coward" would send it out as a follow-up.

How can thinking, feeling people ignore the blatentcy of Jach's codependent set up here?

It isn't only Lazaris who mentions "taboo topics" being an indication of a sick or abusive relationship. It's one of those items listed on every questionaire I've ever seen to help someone figure out if their relationship is healthy or not. Crap, even Cosmo readers know that one.

quote:

---

I think it is plain the unfelt/unexpressed rage and anger that the core CS gang and organization felt toward Penny and Jack coupled with the oppressive psychic burden of having to daily, twist P&J’s toxic, shaming dance of passive and aggressive abuse into acts of love and kindness, made them a hornets nest of misplaced rage and aggression.

---

It does seem like a good idea to give some thought to the intense anger that is so easy to ignite amongst that group.

BTW, someone told me that recently there was another siege starting up in the Forum and that once the victim stopped posting he evidently continued to get ***unsolicted*** e-mail from forum members and complained about it. Piglet wrote a post and asked people to stop. No mention of terrorism or cowardice though. Yet another twisted standard for fair play.

quote:

---

Metaphysics is real and and beautiful and requires individuality, imo, to be made real in ones life.

In short, I just don’t think you can be a follower and create your own reality.

---

Amen to that, beautifully put, and a perfect summation of the belief that drives this site.

Katie